Smarten Up Aubs....

Ayo whattup yall...the Hands of Zeus is back in the buildin nahmean. I jus got done smashin these trees in the forests n throwin some boulders into the oceans namsayin. Word is bond. Ayo summa these muthafuckas who be lookin for guidance n miracles from a nigga in these times of turmoil been askin the god his thoughts on these Drake situations namsayin. Now normally yo...I dont really like to step on a niggas toes nahmean...that aint really the Cocaine Biceps way son. I jus follow my path n dont really pay no attention to what these little sweet n low niggas do. But when muthafuckas start crossin the line....like this nigga rite here...ayo words need to be spoke on behalf of niggas who rep that "bein a man" shit namsayin. Like...that aint no shot at homo niggas b. I dont got no problems wit homo niggas nahmean. Im talmbout niggas who jus do wack ass suspect type shit all day n wanna hop back n forth over the fence.  Im talmbout niggas who sashay around in a garden of dicks all day while they splash they sweet ass appletinis  all over the music industry son. Which gon bring us to this nigga rite here nahmean. Thats rite yo.... the Harvester of Pauses hisself is back to save you broads from yalselves namsayin. You might also kno the nigga as OctobVariesOwn aka the Hugh Grant of rap. Word is bond. The original pastry puff nigga is out there promotin his new album n whatever whatever... you kno how niggas do when they bout to drop they joints....they go on radio n tv...start doin interviews....FOR ELLE MAGAZINE or whatever etc. Anyways tho...Tone jus hadda few thoughts on this shit. These are a couple a the quotes from that next issue OF ELLE MAGAZINE for example nahmean.

On getting hurt by Rihanna           

“At the time it hurt, but she didn’t mean to. I’ll never put that on her. I was hurt because I slowly started to realize what it was. I guess I thought it was more. That was the first girl with any fame that paid me any mind. You spend days reading about this person in magazines. All of a sudden you have this number-one song and you’re at some birthday party and there she is. And you’re just some naive kid from Toronto staying in some shitty-ass hotel who got invited to this party on a whim. That’s just how it happened.”  

Nigga is you fuckin kiddin me wit this shit? Son jus gon take those "vulnerable bitch" pills out the medicine cabinet n then swallow the whole damn bottle like that yo? You jus gon OD on that pathetic shit son? Ayo you on some damsel shit for this one nahmean. Have some fuckin dignity b. 

  

                                                                                                                            
On being lonely

When you’re on the road and moving city to city, when someone isn’t there at the end of the night, you feel empty. The 15 or 20 seconds after a man reaches his climax  is the realest moment he’ll ever have in his life. And if you happen to be with somebody that isn’t someone you want to converse with, you start feeling like, I wish I was just here watching True Blood by myself.”

Where the fuck does this nigga get the nerve to start speakin on the behalfs of all makind like that b? Son there aint one muthafucka on earth worthy of speakin for the whole male population nahmean. N lets say niggas did need a spokesman to represent all the muthafuckas on earth wit dicks....how many dudes you kno would elect this nigga rite here? This nigga talmbout how if the broad who he jus let smash gon turn over n fall asleep after he gives it up to her...that he be feelin used n shit son. Like if she dont wanna enjoy some pillow talk afterwards then she a waste of his time. Son sayin he woulda preferred to jus be watchin vampire shows alone if she jus gon play him like that. Ayo I bet this nigga got little seahorses swimmin around in his bloodstream b. You could probably cut this soft ass nigga open witta Q-tip son.  

On his fake Twitter marriage to Nicki Minaj:

I don’t know if we were really pretending. I’d marry Nicki. I think Nicki would be one of the only people that would understand me at the end of all of this and be able to love me. 

Again wit all this princess shit yo. What grown ass nigga plays make believe wedding witta broad like that? This nigga sounds like he been layin on his stomach in front of a fireplace on some satin pillows readin Briget Jones novels n emptyin out chocolate boxes while listenin to old Whitney Houston joints. Son jus gon keep takin that "stranded puppy lookin for a new home" approach wit these broads forever. Damn son. Ayo Im pretty sure this nigga is afraid of beer yo. I cant even relate to no shit like this b. You kno when you be waitin in line to buy a coffee n theres a nigga in front of you that orders some haf caf extra whip skinny cinnamon soy latte wit a vanilla shot n a low fat yogurt crumpet on the side type bullshit? THAT nigga can relate to Drake nahmean.

On receiving nude pictures: 

If you send them without me asking, it’s like, You’ve done this before. But I’m away a lot. If there’s a woman I’m into, I might want to get a picture from her to handle business myself, as opposed to doing something I might regret.  

Ayo I give up son... its like this nigga gargles vagina nectars in the morning to maintain his bitchass ph balance yo. 

Then the nigga addressed some shit on the Funk Flex show. When Flex asked him bout the joint he did wit Jada n Wayne...n how Wayne took those shots at Hov on it. He had this to say bout that yo...  

“I really just did my verse over the beat, man. I'm not gonna say I didn’t hear the song before it came out. Wayne recently said in an article that I can never feel like I created a monster in Drake because I’m his boss.’ And in every regard that’s a respectable comment. I’m a soldier for Wayne, he put me here, so I just really did what I had to do, which was deliver a verse on a beat and what he does with the song after that is completely up to him.”

Son Had this shit to say bout those shots that Pusha took at his delicate ass on his 'Dont Fuck With Me' joint...

"I listened to it and I just couldn’t pick it out. I couldn’t pick out where I was supposed to be offended. First of all I never really had any interaction with Pusha T so for him to diss me would be purely issues that he’s having within himself. We’ve met but we’ve been just always cordial with each other. I’m a fan of The Clipse. I say it in interviews so I never really had an issue with him but you know it’s a frustrating time for a lot of people right now. I get it, so if it was directed at me just make it a lil’ more direct next time. You know, I’m up for whatever, man. I didn’t take offense to it, though.” 

Ok...first off b...the nigga is rhymin on YOUR beat son. Thats 1) nahmean.....thats a pretty obvious one too yo.  2) That  man said "The swag dont match the sweaters"....

Stop playin dumb b...

Basically that nigga Push coulda said "Drake Drake Drake Drake Drake" at the end of the song n this nigga would still be like..."naww...not sure he talmbout yours truly awwwww". Ayo its like this nigga is allergic to havin male traits b. This dude got tumbleweeds rollin round in that area in the muthafuckin human brain where you spose to have dignity cells at yo. Ayo Im done par. See you when the Take Care joint drops.

Aight peace.

"I want your Hershey's Kisses, I want your Snickers Bar........."