Ayo whattup its ya boy P-Tone aka Cocaine Biceps aka Zeus Hands namsayin. Word is bond. Ayo this shit is another rare exclusive for yalls nahmean. Now that me n the J Cole fans who got offended by how yours truly felt bout his joint done broke bread...the god jus wanted to offer this as a gesture of his thanks n shit yo. Yall probably noticed that there wasn't mad features on that Sideline Story joint....aka Lolmatic....but this is the song that got left off the album apparently yo. This shit aint had no name when it found its way into my hands tho son...n there aint no hook on this shit neither so I mma jus call this shit Mongolian Panthers yo. Hopefully yalls is feelin this shit. Word.
Aight peace.
BIG GHOST CHRONICLES PRESENTS
A WORLD EXCLUSIVE
MONGOLIAN PANTHERS
Jadakiss
Ayo the grips is all rubber, but the guns is metal, jack
The clips stay full, so if I whip you ya head'll crack
If the rap money stops, yall know how we thuggin it
I still got the scales, the cookware, n the oven mitts
Pockets is still fat, so you ain't gotta lend a coin
I pull up in that Jag truck the color of tenderloin
Niggas hatin Kiss, but I don't mean ta startle kids
when I come thru in that 'Rari the same color as cartilage
Montega Jada, in the streets I'm a warlord
I keep 900 bricks in the ceilings n floorboards
Niggas might hear that, n try to come rob the crib
Next they'll be sayin's "damn, I think he just shot my ribs"
If Kiss catches a body, I aint sayin it's positive
But I'ma hop a plane n lay low where Shabba lives
Be on that G5 before the D's know who to warn,
And tell these flight attendants that we bout to shoot a porn
Let em gimme top while they still in they uniforms
Afterwards, I have some baked dolphin and unicorns
Its that nigga Montega, no homo or lip balm
My life is like a movie, yall niggas live sitcoms
Pull up in that 'Kunta Kinte wrist shackles gray' Jag
With the stove on my waist, n I don't mean Maytag
Roosters in the luggage, not the kind that'll cockadoodle
Then I jump in a helicopter the color of pasta noodles
Aheeaaaaaaaaaa!
Pusha
Yuuuuuchhhkk
We kiss the cheeks of the coke czars........
They know our names... send us birthday giftssss n postcards
Our kids plaaay, our wives exchange pleasantries...
We go to dinner, the wine aloooone is eleven Gs
Nigga...I ain't imPRESSED with the present breeds...
Thats why I GUESSsss I only compete with dead emcees
No longer livin...never forget the influence
Surrounded by drug lords and other crime constituents
Pussssh...the ohh-eleven Don Vito...
But I NEVER hand the business down to these conchitos
We move weight from Montana to Montego
Finish what we start...we don't live by Lebron's credo
Yuuuuuchhhk...bitches sayin dude's vain
What you ex-PECT when a G in the pocket's loose change?
80 karats on one finger, thats my moooood ring
Money's my bitch...I ain't lookin for a new fling
......Pull the doors up on that Aventador
Hoes we pass on are the sames ones you cats would die for
What yall be callin dimes, we don't even bat an eye for
Your million dollar chain's a fraction of the one that what i wore
Test us? Naaah.....only the best could
My hoes rock Kate Spade...n Vivienne Westwood
.....Bolivian Express goods....
get dropped off on my door STEP...then swept thru to the next hood.
PUSSSHHH!
Fabolous
Niggas think they seein F-A-B?
Then I guess they free...
Then I guess they free...
to come test me like the S-A-Ts
We in the V wit the fresh AC
...puffin H-A-Z
We the pimps, not the F-A-Gs
Don't make me let the AK squeeze
all in ya H-A-Ts
I'm the nigga takin 8 days sprees
to tropical islands with trees where bananas hang
Spittin at these hoes wit thug talk n a gang a slang
Homie, you got bitches that look like orangutangs
While I be pullin southern belle hoes n Savannah thangs
I know ya man right here's a burden, so fuck it, sis
The Maybey outside got curtains n buckets, miss
Diamonds in my chain thats the size of McNuggets, bitch
We the kinda niggas you don't bring the ruckus wit
Plus, you ready know the D's watch us, believe this
They aint lettin me go wit 3 watches on each wrist
In the holding cell, we puff cubans n eat fish
An hour til I'm bailed n chuck a deuce from a G6
The Benz got 84" rims with the deep dish
Spend on ya lady more, so you know who she keeps with
Niggas think I'm vain cos my material objects
N I roll around with they dames up in my steering wheel cockpits
I'ma bury ya'll lames cos I'm clearly obnoxious
N the pieces on my chain's the size of cereal boxes
Drake
Awwwhhng
Drizzy
Ackhk............a red plus a blue makes a purple.....
Two wrongs don't make a right, but two broken hearts make a circle
Can a hamster find mafuckin love witta gerbil?
Do two cancers make a virgo? Think I needed to find out...ergo...
I carry errything on my own back.................turtle
Carry my own baggage with me.....what a fuckin purseload
I been airin out my laudry n I'm still just on the first load
It's the bane of my existence, mahfucka..........Kurt Co
Shoutouts to my stylists Kyle, Frankie n Gilberto
My heart is like my stage, nigga....full - dress - rehearsals
T-O show a nigga hate sometimes, it's hurtful
T-Vo Degrassi, mahfuckas, no commercials
Boy I'm poured up, I'm just swirling ma own merlot
Drank so much of that shit boy, I think I need a girdle
But noooooooooooo, don't make me put ya name in my journal
Cos I be catchin BAWDIES like a robin in a wormhole
They said that Aubs was Aubsolete
Aubviously, they was wrong
Cos the Aubstacles they tryna put before me only made me strong
awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
You don't want no beef with Aubs, vegan
Pussay niggas comin at me, young Aubstetrician
Boy....consider that ma fuckin Aubservations
Reppin for mah family's my only Aub-li-gay-shunnnnnn ooooooooohhhhhhhh
J Cole
Cole........World.....
Straight out the Ville...Niggas sayin...
"You da man now Cole, now how dat feel?" ....I'ma tell y'all the deal
I got up OFF my mama's sofa...n came to the home of Biggie n Hova
The homies tol' me, Cole, you ain't gon make it, we tol'yuh
Years later, them same niggas sayin, "you done blown up!"
Guess what go around come around like a DOUGH-NUT
Guess I'm like a sandwhich, mahfucka I got COLD CUTS
MAN, I came to this city with only FO'Bucks....but SO WHAT
Them same niggas callin like "Cole, we beg ya pardon"
Musta thought my shit was over, but bitch, I was only fartin
Matter fact, I'm stilll eatin that cabbage straight from my garden
Niggas say they spittin, well I guess I must be barfin
Mahfucka, I ain't just spittin, nigga, I'm pukin
N I'ma be poopin while these niggas is only tootin
Nigga, I wrote this at my crib while watchin Juice n,
sippin on some juice n, eatin lotsa fruits n
Veg-ta-boles, ya'lls ain't fresh as Cole's
Might eat a bean burrito like I was from Mex-i-co
And boy, I ain't ashamed to tell you that I shed my tears
Cuz while I was doin that, I guess I shed my fears
Now these bitches become ladies, that don't mean they aint bitchin
Cole World, muthafucka, no jackets, scarfs, or mittens
No furnaces, no fireplaces, or campfires forever
No snuggies, no blankets, n sorry Drizzy, no sweaters (Drake: Awww)
(J Cole singing)
Rush, rush...
Hurry, hurry lover, come to me
Rush, rush
I wanna see, I wanna see ya get free with meee-eeeeee
Rush, rush
I can feel it, I can feel it all through meeeee
Rush, rush...
Oooooooooh what you do to me
"No snuggies, no blankets, n sorry Drizzy, no sweaters (Drake: Awww)"
ReplyDeleteHAHAHAHAHAHA
That picture of Aubs might be the funniest thing I've seen on this blog
ReplyDelete"My life is like a movie, yall niggas live sitcoms"
ReplyDeleteDAMN
"And boy, I ain't ashamed to tell you that I shed my tears
Cuz while I was doin that, I guess I shed my fears"
That sh!t deserves to be repeated accapella. That's some mind-blowin grimey stuff right there.
"Shoutouts to my stylists Kyle, Frankie n Gilberto
ReplyDeleteMy heart is like my stage, nigga....full - dress - rehearsals
T-O show a nigga hate sometimes, it's hurtful
T-Vo Degrassi, mahfuckas, no commercials"
FUcK!!! ...son you LIKE it when i shoot iced tea out my nose?? my own damn fault i shoulda known better.. straight Goro 4-handed applause on this joint fam
"No snuggies, no blankets, n sorry Drizzy, no sweaters (Drake: Awww)"
ReplyDeleteI'm fucking dead after that one. I can just imagine it and it's fucking awesome. Thanks P-Tone !
Ahahaha yo this is definitely on point. I don't know how you do this shit so perfect god.
ReplyDeleteGod damn Ghost! You're on fire man....!
ReplyDeleteWhat's your inspiration kid? What you're doin?
The last 2 drake verses + Jcoles whole verse(nailed those corny punchlines)
ReplyDelete*dead*
looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooool
ReplyDeleteI swear I read every bar from each artists with the artist's voice in my head and you(p-tone) got it spot on.
I hope your gonna review Styles P'S album, Master of Ceremonies.
jada's verse- a continuation of his missing joint off the carter IV
ReplyDeletepusha's verse- that's that nigga's style all day.
fab's verse- the first 8 bars is exactly something he'd start his verse with.
(tim) drizzy's verse- went the hell in.
j-cole's verse- you might have killed the "cole world, no *place object used to keep you warm here*) forever.
the hook- now i have an idea of what the beat must sound like.
You truly a Titan, Ghost!
ReplyDeleteyeyeayeah you be gettin' inside they heads like yo! namsayn snatchin they thoughts n shit.
ReplyDeleteyouknow these cats bangin' they heads to the wall goin, namsayn goin crazy, like 'DAMN..HOWTHE?!? ..WHAT THE...?!??' "BUT I..." "WHO THE...???"
Ghost gone mess around n hadees fools straight laid up on the couch somewhere on that psychotherapy tip. some crusty ass old white dude takin notes n shit..
Daaaammmnnnn!!! This is some marvelous shit!
ReplyDeleteYou fuckin nailed the Pusha T verse...
Nigga...I ain't imPRESSED with the present breeds...
Thats why I GUESSsss I only compete with dead emcees
No longer livin...never forget the influence
Surrounded by drug lords and other crime constituents
OH.HELL.YES.
Keep up the good work.
you will be hearing from my attorney...
ReplyDelete"Musta thought my shit was over, but bitch, I was only fartin"
ReplyDeleteNailed it.
LMAO IM DYING
ReplyDeleteoh man.. i can see Aubrey blowing a kiss to Keanu Reeves from Paula Abdul's video..
ReplyDeletehahah great shit, fabs verse could have used a couple oversimplified cheezy metaphors tho lol
ReplyDeleteI LOLD hard at the J.Cole verse! You the man Big Ghost!
ReplyDeleteGhost, You Are Hilarious!
ReplyDeleteThese fools should form a super group called Estrogen Popsicles!
Im shedding real tears from everything about this post.
ReplyDeletehttp://www.inflexwetrust.com/2011/10/12/drake-talks-three-somes-being-hurt-by-rihanna-twitter-marriages-and-more/
ReplyDeleteyour boy Aubrey at it again
hilarious post btw
"helicopter the color of pasta noodles"
ReplyDeletethat's Jada's shit right there! Nailed it!
Yo Ghost, rumor is you're sitting on a couple unreleased Jay Electronica joints. You gonna release them sh!ts anytime soon?
ReplyDeleteI've said it previously, but GAWDDAMN Ghost, your the man. You're like every rapper rolled into one but way fresher.
ReplyDeletehahahah! classic verses, but the paula abdul outro did me in.
ReplyDelete"Lolmatic"
ReplyDelete^^^
i can't breathe...
forreal i wanna thank all these wack rappers.. let's give it up one time for the whole YM, the boy Jermaine, too many a yalls to name right now. whattup solja.. i see you Ricky, you disgusting lard ass motherfucker. yeah son. cause forreal, namsayn.. without yall fast food twinkie 4am drive through bitches, we wouldn't be gathered here today aight. so raise ya mug. let's have a toast to the sad sorry state of hiphop right now, for it's yalls who gave birth to the BGN comedy movement. yall do serve a purpose. sniper need a target. we gots nuff good shit to feast on in the fridge n freezer namsayn from years past. we stocked up when shit was raw n saved that for the lean times nahmean. them Brand Nu niggas seen it comin. i got that Wu when i need a nutritious meal son. that Beatnut butta to spread on Hieroglyphics bread. feast kid. i keeps them DITC crates on ice. Native Tongues peoples feed the children. nahmsayn my grandkids man. frozen Boot Camp n Mobb MRE rations keep a nigga belly full when we on lockdown during hurricanes of wackness n torrential lotion monsoons. GRap gon feed us for generations when we livin' on other planets n shit after earth collapse n shit. peace
ReplyDeleteAyo, I ain't gon lie, that Pusha verse was kinda hot, I mean it's his style all day no doubt par, but damn getting birthday gifts and postcards from the Colombians...GOT DAMN. Ghost you always on son.
ReplyDeleteJeez.... I love your mind ;)
ReplyDeleteThis is the absolute funniest fucking blog in history. lol
ReplyDeleteBest part is the Jadakiss photo. Hands down.
ReplyDeleteOmg, I can't breathe... this shit is soooo damn funny. Perfection.
ReplyDeleteSO FUNNY. all that was missing was "LOS" at the end of Fab's verse (or some variation thereof)
ReplyDelete